Pag-iyak

Nabasag ako...
Pero nung umiyak ako
Hindi ako nabawasan
Nabuo pa nga ako.... Den Mar

Pagsubok

Hindi pa nga ako nakakahinga
Heto ako, muling sisisid na naman. Den Mar

Pasensya

meron reklamo ng reklamo sa 'beloved' nya na ang pangalan ay 'loving'
nung bandang huli e sumuko na rin siya
kaya lang nung natahimik yung nagrereklamong si 'loving'
nagtaka naman si 'beloved' kung bakit naging 'patay-mali' (snobbish) na lang si 'loving'
sabi ni 'loving' : "kasi natanggap ko na kasi ikaw"
natuwa naman si 'beloved' kaya lang hindi naging matagal ang kasiyahan nya hanggang narinig nya yung final word ni 'loving'
"natanggap  ko nang hindi mo ako kayang mahalin..." Den Mar

Pagbibigay

Nang ako'y mayaman
at nag-uumapaw ang mga biyaya
Itinuring kong
ako ang pinagpala ng Diyos

Nang makita kita
na lugmok at lubhang nagdurusa
Ang akala ko
ikaw ang sinusubok ng Diyos

Subalit sa katagalan...
mula nang ikaw ay aking talikuran
Nabatid kong ako pala ang sinusubok
At ikaw ang pinagpapala

Ilang ulit akong sinubok ng pagkakataon
upang maging mapagbigay
Sa isang tulad mong
ilang ulit kong tinalikdan.

Demonic Possession

I remember, our batch gave a recollection at Paridise Farm High School sometime in year 2010. I held a session on 'inner healing.' A session about forgiveness and going back to Jesus. In a sense, it's a renewal session.

By the end of my talk after reading my recollection material (see:  http://denmar1978.blogspot.com/b/post-preview?token=PuVeszoBAAA.hs88sh2mx7SfAjGoNLHB0A.xGlAPhfVVlKrKjSQtud9UQ&postId=5937772655069989852&type=POST ), most students were already crying.

When I said my last few words, “isuko nyo na ang lahat kay Jesus” suddenly, a teenage girl started shouting, “Huwag kang lumapit!” Her eyes suddenly rolled then turned into all black. Her voice changed. She shouted so loud that our prayer session in that room was suddenly interrupted. I said “In Jesus’ name” but the more she shrieked until she collapsed and went into seizure. Brothers Leo, Rex, Renoir, Felix and Ian went into our room to pacify the commotion. But another girl from another corner suddenly shouted, “Huwag kang lumapit!” as if there was an unseen terrifying person. I said again, “In Jesus’ name.” Then her voice changed, shouting at me, “itigil mo yan!” Other students were already terrified.

Leo and I attended her. When we prayed the ‘Our Father,’ I felt a very strong blow. I was astounded; I just don’t know how did that unexpected event happened. Br. Leo continued praying. I asked Leo, “naramdaman mo?” And Leo told me, “Oo, naramdaman ko rin.” There was a black thing which rushed from out of nowhere.

When both of the girls were already calm, we brought them to the the school’s clinic to rest. Brother Ian, as the emcee, closed my interrupted talk through a prayer. Everybody was so silent. Nobody dared to talk. Everybody in that room was in the state of shock.

x x x

It was only during our class in Spiritual Theology under Fr. Syquia, the exorcist of the Archbishop of Manila, that I understood that evil spirits are active in our midst. What they want is our attention taken away from Jesus. They don’t want us to love God. They don’t want us to go near God. They don’t want us to call on Jesus’ name.

But when they hear us saying the name of Jesus, the name above all name, they start to tremble and start to be afraid. Father Syquia advised us to “send them to the foot of the cross.”

x x x

After everything subsided, while having our dinner that night, Br. Rex was teasing me jokingly, “Ikaw talaga brother may sapi ka talaga, dinadamay mo pa pati ang mga bata.” And I told him, “kasi naman ikaw ‘bay,’ (he's a Visayan) ikaw ang prayer warrior para sa session namin, tapos ang ginawa mo lang e naglaro ka lang ng Plants and Zombies! Naging zombies tuloy yung mga estudyante ko! buti na lang napaalis ni Leo yung demonyo.” Of course that was a hell and frightening day for all of us. Rex, the ever ‘nerbiyoso’ among our batch just want to have a sort of ‘relief,’ ‘an airing out’ of that eerie experience. All throughout that afternoon, brothers Renoir and Joseph remained silent. Br. Felix told us, “Siguro natakot yung demonyo sa presensce natin kasi nakapag-Mass naman tayo bago magbigay ng recollection. Natakot siya kay Jesus na nasa ating lahat.”

And I realized from then on, “Oo nga, natakot ang Demonyo sa amin… kasi si Jesus ay 'nanahang ganap sa aming lahat.'” Truly, the Holy Eucharist that we receive every time we participate in the Holy Mass is a glimpse of eternity in heaven, wherein in the Holy Name of Jesus, every knee must bend. The evil spirit knew that and with Jesus in us, he cannot do any more harm but to leave in Jesus' name.




= = =

AFTERTHOUGHTS:

I cannot believe that it happened. I want to believe that what has transpired to the two students was only a psychological breakdown. But being interviewed separaterly in different rooms where we brought them, they have the same story: they've seen the black silhouette coming to them. They have the same description of their haunting vision. The two students were not friends, they don't have the chance to talk to one another, they came from different sections.

One thing was common to both of them, they cannot forgive, they were both motivated by a very deep seated anger which was rooted from their own family experiences. Much worse than that, they admitted that they hated God. In my personal interview with them, they admit that they don't believe in God anymore. And that recollection was the time that they needed to 'disbond' themselves from the evil works of the devil, but the devil won't let them go. The evil spirit don't want them to forgive and to move on. The evil spirit don't want them to embrace Jesus.

In recollection and retreat giving, we realized the importance of exorcising the venue first by a simple deliverance prayer that could be said by lay people (Fr. Syquia's first volume on Exorcism has it).  It is helpful that there are prayer warriors to counter-act with evil spirits. And most of all, speakers and participants (if there's a chance) should have their proper disposition by attending mass and receiving the Holy Eucharist.

Although, this was an isolated case, faith really matters. We were thankful to God that we hold on to the promise of Jesus that where ever there are two or three gathered together, Jesus will always be present.


AFTER THREE YEARS--
A TALK WITH BR. RENOIR, SSS (has a gift to sense the presence of the elementals)

During our lunch, Br. Renoir and I had a chance to reminisce the past. "Mapuno kasi sa lugar." He said to me. "More or less, merong mga galang ispiritu sa ganung klaseng lugar." He added, "hindi iyon nag-iisa, marami iyon."

I told him, "actually, that was a very eerie matter for me, after three years, ngayon ko lang nga naisip na alalahanin iyon kasi dahil iyon ang Gospel reading ngayon at nagkataong ako rin ang sharer."

"Aside from Jesus, takot na takot din sila kay Mama Mary. She's the only mortal na galit na galit ang mga demonyo kasi hindi nila matanggap na ang ordinaryong tao na katulad niya ay pagpapalain ng Diyos," he uttered in a sincere voice.

I affirm what he had said, "Oo, nga. Sabi ni nga Fr. Syquia, kapag napapagod na siyang mag-'exorcise' kapag tinawag na nya si Mama Mary e sumisigaw na sa takot ang demonyo. Sumisigaw ng 'Ayan na sila.'"

"Mama Mary is accompanied with Angels to defend us always," Br. Renoir said.



A REFLECTION OF A FRANCISCAN PRIEST

When there's an opportunity, when there's no class, specially on Sundays, I usually hear mass at the Sta. Clara monastery at Katipunan, Quezon City. It so happened that the Gospel during that Sunday was about demons.

On the priest's homily, he mentioned that demons in our time decided not to reveal themselves. In our time, usually, we are not afraid anymore on 'duwende,' 'nuno sa punso,' 'tikbalang,' and the like-- it's because we are not afraid of them anymore and we are not fascinated anymore to them. So they changed their way of attacking us. Before, they reveal themselves just to show to us that they are more powerful than God-- that they can heal and do miracles. But now, at the age of Science, suddenly, they became myth. They decided not to reveal themselves for us to think that there's no God.

They cannot enslaved us anymore out of fear so they enslaved us out of pleasure. They can affect our senses by luring us into the desire of our flesh.

====
Biblical Reading:

Ephesians 6:10-20

10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. 11Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13Therefore take the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; 16besides all these, taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one. 17And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18Pray at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints, 19and also for me, that utterance may be given me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, 20for which I am an ambassador in chains; that I may declare it boldly, as I ought to speak.


Br. Dennis DC. Marquez, sSSS

Different perspective

apprentice: i can't see.
guru: just open your heart.

Challenges

life's challenges
are not merely physical
nor intellectual
most test our spirit--
the goodness within us.

Anger

Wala na akong panahong magalit
Dahil pagod na pagod na ako.

Ang pwede ko na lang gawin
Ay ang magmahal at wala nang iba.